She is still here...
I am still here...
We look at each other in exasperation...
I know I have shared this many times, but I have to say it again, I have never experienced a bible study as deep and meaning-rich as being here on the farm. Today is no different. I am back at a patience/impatience limbo with God. I seem to wrestle this issue out quite often.
I do like to come out here and sit on the fence but I don't like watching her pace and pant (it is hot). Her wait is so long and unnecessary. Why, why must she wait? It has gone from days to weeks...
The questioning turns personal quickly. Why am I sitting here waiting? Why must I wait? Why can't life be easier? Why can't the paths be well marked and speedy? What is it that she/me/we are waiting for again?
Do I need to learn patience? Seriously? More patience?
Or am I just missing something you want me to see?
Are you just asking me to slow down?
Deliciously chocolate dirt~
Tiniest little green rhubarb leaves~
Sweet little baby pears~
Stonehouse lawns lit up in the evening sun~
Lately we have also had a visitor, a screech owl (I have been told). He lives in the tall trees and is the same color as the bark, making him a bit hard to see. He is a huge presence when I get close, I stand quietly below the tree and talk to him quietly. "Hello sweet thing, what do you see?"
The owl is also a living testament to this patient pause. This sweetheart will sit in that same tree for hours barely moving. Is that the patience you are thinking of God? Sitting that still? Taking in everything around me and silently breathing?
Pregnant pauses in life. Do you have them too?
Do you do as I do and rush to get past them -- instead of letting them do their heart-art building work?
I am learning...learning to listen to the quiet peace of my heart.
She always seems to know what adventure is coming next...
Here's to you my lovely friends~
May your days be filled with goodness
grace & peace,
If you think about it, say a prayer for my sweet ewe?
jj
that poor expectant mummy. she looks so ready. I'll be thinking of her and sending positive thoughts that her time comes quickly and safely.
ReplyDeleteI'm a rusher - I need to slow down. This is really something I need to learn. It is part of my word this year (release) and my scrapbooking is helping me along that route.
Your art, however, is breathtaking. You brighten my day ;-)
thanks for the photos and the thoughts. sweet ewe, and sweet you, both will be in my thoughts and prayers. May you be blessed and feel loved.
ReplyDeleteI will think of/pray for your sweet ewe - poor girl. I do know those kind of moments in life where patience is needed. It has at times driven to almost distraction. But there's always a reason. It's quite challenging in its ways to just stay intact/still in those moments. It's struck me personally within the last few days how much wisdom I could extract if I was more able to be with the moments I find myself in - whatever they are. It actaually made me want to revisit your post from earlier this year about how to become good at writing (I'm sure it would help me right now!).
ReplyDeleteWishing you quiet and peaceful listening dear friend.