Wednesday, January 5, 2011
It is a beautiful thing to have your world turn white.
I struggle here with these long months of cold. I wilt, I shiver, and I get quiet inside. The constant deep freeze and snowstorms seem to drive the sun lover in me deep into hibernation state. It is a yearly battle to keep my head up during these darkest weeks. However, this week as I looked out at the marshmallow creme landscape I realized I was seeing something in a new way and it was something I could really love.
A perfectly white, fresh new, clean canvas.
Brilliant white - with even a shimmery sparkle to it~
How did I not appreciate this before? The artist in me has come alive with a big dose of new hope.
Look at this place...It is beautiful!
It is perfect for dreaming, hoping, imagining~
I have had a couple weeks of deep introspection. I wanted to write, I love to write here, but I couldn't. I dictated everything I wanted to say in bed at night as the words and images tumbled in my head. Stories of the silly holiday things we did, stories of Christmas past, wonderings of the sheep as they sunbathe in warm places all came to mind. As much as I meant to write, I when I went to actually put words down they didn't work, I didn't have it in me.
I guess I was on time out. :o)
The holidays did me in (they always do), and I seemed to fray at both ends. Even though I cried at just about everything, I didn't feel sad. It was so strange. I didn't understand until last night as I lay in bed, tumbling more thoughts & words in my head, I realized I have been in this place before and I didn't need to worry.
It is part of life to fall down...it can be messy, but this is a good messy.
And I could embrace this messiness and not think I was going completely crazy? Yep.
It is just transition. For anyone that has delivered a baby, do you remember that super yucky feeling in childbirth when it seems like your body and brain give up? You feel so bad and can't imagine ever getting to the other side of labor? I don't know of any feeling much worse than laboring transition but I do know you come out of it. And after those hideous moments of despairing~ you give birth to something (or someone) super wonderful. Yes, I feel like I am coming out of transition.
We all know that life doesn't stay the same...thank goodness...and growth isn't pain free.
I am excited for what is ahead...pushing on...(thinking of Paul this morning)...
Life is already so much better this week. I invested in a bit of self-care, less sugar, a facial & massage, dark pink toenails. I talked with some friends (always good), and most of all I quietly listened to what God was breathing into my heart & mind. I filled my cup with Him. I can already feel the healing changes~
And today is a *brilliant brand-new sparkling white canvas* and I am so excited about it! Yes!
(Here are my winter friends to help me welcome in the year)
I really hope your holidays were filled with yummy goodness, and I also hope that your new year is filled with something sparkling new, too~ I will be by to visit!
A lovely self-portrait of my *adventures in white* this morning~ negative 10 degrees!
With a grateful heart for today,
in His brilliant grace & peace,
More blessings in this transition time? A couple of photo-shoots with some Mums and sweet babes~
Posted by Junelle Jacobsen at 10:18 AM